its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
