Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
