im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Be still, my beating vagina.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
