hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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