so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
