We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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