It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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