Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
