OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
the day after is always just damage control
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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