We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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