No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
