At least make sure they are 18
Why
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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