Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I just blew my weed a kiss
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
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