Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
