help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
