Are we in a gay sports bar?
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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