I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
how does that bad decision feel?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize