My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
