Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
