I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
