She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Randomize