What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
