Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Randomize
