This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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