It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
