Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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