Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
