He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I will be naked everywhere
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Randomize
