I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
