it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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