I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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