The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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