Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
