you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
