its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
