she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
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