okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
