Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
