i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
