Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
