I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
