am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
