Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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