You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
