Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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