Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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