East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
