Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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