YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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