My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
So much rum. So many feels.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
