Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
